Benedict, White Smoke and Kansas

This is Reggie reporting on yesterday’s news, today.

As always, Cletus is operating the board behind the glass. He’s so cute back there with Rufus just wagging that big ole’ tail.

Such a good boy…

So the news…

It was announced that Pope Benedict would be resigning. The first Grand Poohbah to have retired in six hundred years. I do not remember who the first runner up was that would take over, but I’m hoping for Miss Kansas. I seem to recall that she wanted world peace and, shoot…what more could we want in the papal office?

Really, folks, in all seriousness they need to choose a young’un…maybe that Justin Bieber fella.  With his wholesome family values, he is bound to do good, right?  He was upset at getting snubbed for some award show last night, so he’d love the attention.Maybe it could be that nice Taylor Swift…she’s not married, so she could do it…and she has some weird issues about British people.  Mind you, all my music awards go to Faith Hill for obvious reasons…

Right Cletus?  Obvious reasons?

That’s right…

So now, we gonna just sit right back and wait until the Cardinal College puffs out their white smoke…makes you wonder what they do in that place to decide that causes them all to want cigarettes after, doesn’t it?  And why in tarnation do they gotta go polluting the air with that garbage?  Don’t they know that weed is cleaner?

They also sayin’ that a Canadian…a queeebecker is expected to be next in the big chair.  Marc Woo-let from Lamot, Queebeck…

That’s like ten minutes from our hometown, isn’t it Cletus?

Speaking of close to home, a tornado ripped through Tupelo, Mississippi.  That Florida trailer part was in clean-up mode again after…

Cletus, you know that park, right?  Where your mama lives?  The one that they have to clean up when any tornado or hurricane hits anywhere, right?  Did she at least take my advice and nail that mobile home to the ground?

In Egypt there were protesters fighting with police today as well…they says they want President Mursi to leave…and go to a trailer park in Florida.

I thought the president was named Obama?  Cletus!  I need a fact check.

That’s the day as I see it, folks.  On behalf of my good buddy Cletus…and his doberman Rufus…this is Reggie Kincaid.

Remember, folks, the night is young, and absurdity is a choice. G’night!

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